Domestic violence is a widespread and deeply concerning issue that affects millions of individuals across the United States each year. In fact, statistics show that every minute, approximately 24 people become victims of rape, physical violence, or stalking by an intimate partner. That adds up to more than 12 million women and men annually, which calls for stronger legal protections and swift intervention.
When domestic violence charges are filed, they often come with serious consequences, including the possibility of a restraining order. For those involved—whether as the accused or the alleged victim—navigating the legal process can be overwhelming. Understanding what to expect is essential, especially when both criminal charges and protective orders are in play.
In this comprehensive guide, we’ll break down what domestic violence charges entail, how restraining orders function, and what happens at each stage of the legal journey.
What Are Domestic Violence Charges?
Domestic violence charges arise when someone is accused of committing harm or threats of harm against a person with whom they share a close relationship. These relationships typically include:
- Spouses or former spouses
- Domestic partners
- Boyfriends or girlfriends
- Family members or relatives
- Co-parents of a child
Examples of domestic violence behavior that could result in charges include:
- Physical assault or battery
- Verbal threats of violence
- Intimidation or stalking
- Destruction of property
- Sexual abuse
- Emotional or psychological manipulation
In many states, once law enforcement responds to a domestic dispute and finds probable cause, they are legally obligated to arrest the alleged perpetrator—even if the victim doesn’t want to press charges.
How Serious Are Domestic Violence Charges?
Domestic violence charges can range from misdemeanors to felonies, depending on the severity of the allegations, the presence of weapons, prior criminal history, and injuries sustained.
Penalties for Domestic Violence Charges May Include:
- Jail or prison time
- Fines and court costs
- Probation or parole
- Mandatory anger management or counseling
- Loss of custody or visitation rights
- Loss of firearm ownership rights
- A permanent criminal record
Being convicted of domestic violence has long-term consequences, even beyond the courtroom. It can affect your employment, housing, and reputation.
What Is a Restraining Order?
A restraining order—also called a protective order—is a court-issued document that limits or prohibits contact between two individuals. Restraining orders are often issued shortly after domestic violence charges are filed to protect the alleged victim from further harm.
There are different types of restraining orders, including:
- Emergency Protective Orders (EPO): Typically issued by police or judges on short notice. These last a few days.
- Temporary Restraining Orders (TRO): Lasts for several weeks until a formal hearing.
- Permanent Restraining Orders: Issued after a court hearing and may last months or years, depending on the case.
What Does a Restraining Order Do?
A restraining order can include a wide range of restrictions, such as:
- No physical contact or communication with the protected person
- Staying a certain distance away from the protected person’s home, work, or school
- Prohibiting firearm possession
- Granting temporary child custody or visitation arrangements
- Requiring the restrained person to move out of a shared home
Violating a restraining order is a separate criminal offense and can lead to immediate arrest and additional charges.
How Are Restraining Orders Issued After Domestic Violence Charges?
When someone is arrested for domestic violence, a temporary restraining order is often issued automatically to protect the alleged victim. Here’s how the process usually works:
Step-by-Step Breakdown:
- Incident occurs and police are called.
- Suspect is arrested and taken into custody.
- Victim may request a restraining order through law enforcement or directly through the court.
- Court reviews the request and may issue a temporary order immediately.
- A hearing is scheduled (often within 2–3 weeks) to determine whether a long-term restraining order is necessary.
- Both parties present evidence and testimony at the hearing.
- The judge decides whether to dismiss the restraining order or make it permanent.
In many jurisdictions, a domestic violence case can proceed even if the victim doesn’t want a restraining order or no longer wants to press charges.
Can You Challenge a Restraining Order?
Yes. If a restraining order has been issued against you, you have the legal right to contest it. At the hearing, both parties can:
- Present evidence (e.g., texts, emails, photos, medical records)
- Call witnesses to testify
- Question the opposing side’s credibility
- Be represented by an attorney
Challenging a restraining order is crucial if you believe the accusations are false or exaggerated, especially if the order affects your parental rights, housing, or ability to work.
What If You Violate a Restraining Order?
Violating a restraining order is a criminal offense. Even if the alleged victim consents to contact, the restrained person is still breaking the law by responding. Common violations include:
- Calling or texting the protected person
- Showing up at their home, work, or school
- Attempting to contact them through social media or third parties
Consequences of violating a restraining order include:
- Arrest and jail time
- Additional fines
- Harsher penalties on the original domestic violence case
- Difficulty negotiating plea deals
Judges take restraining order violations seriously, especially when tied to a pending domestic violence charge.
What Happens in Court After Domestic Violence Charges?
The court process can be overwhelming for both parties. Here’s a general timeline of what to expect:
1. Arraignment
- The accused is formally charged
- A plea (guilty, not guilty, or no contest) is entered
- Bail and restraining orders are reviewed
2. Pretrial Hearings
- Evidence is shared (discovery)
- Motions may be filed (e.g., to dismiss or suppress evidence)
- Plea negotiations occur
3. Trial (if no plea deal is reached)
- Both sides present evidence and witness testimony
- Judge or jury determines guilt
- Sentencing follows if found guilty
Throughout this process, a restraining order may remain in effect. Violations can derail defense strategies and result in harsher outcomes.
Can Domestic Violence Charges Be Dropped?
This is one of the most common questions asked—and the answer isn’t simple.
Charges Are Filed by the State, Not the Victim
Once charges are filed, it is up to the prosecutor, not the victim, to decide whether to move forward. Even if the victim asks to have the charges dropped, the case may proceed if the state believes there is enough evidence to secure a conviction.
However, a victim who recants or refuses to testify may weaken the prosecution’s case. Still, prosecutors can use:
- Police reports
- Medical records
- 911 call recordings
- Witness testimony
How Domestic Violence Charges and Restraining Orders Impact Life
Even without a conviction, being charged with domestic violence and having a restraining order issued can have a lasting impact. Potential effects include:
- Employment problems: Some jobs may terminate employees with criminal charges, especially in education, healthcare, and law enforcement.
- Housing issues: Many landlords run background checks that reveal pending charges or restraining orders.
- Immigration consequences: Non-citizens may face deportation or denied applications for visas or green cards.
- Loss of gun rights: A restraining order often leads to the surrender of any firearms, and a conviction may cause permanent loss of this right.
How to Protect Yourself If You’re Facing Domestic Violence Charges
Being charged doesn’t make you guilty—but the way you respond matters. Here’s how to protect yourself:
Do:
- Hire a criminal defense attorney immediately
- Follow the terms of any restraining order exactly
- Avoid contacting the alleged victim—even through others
- Collect evidence that supports your version of events
- Appear in court and respect all legal deadlines
Don’t:
- Try to talk your way out of the charges
- Violate a restraining order under any circumstances
- Post about the incident or person online
- Ignore court dates or legal notices
- Assume the case will go away on its own
What to Do If You’re a Victim Seeking Protection
If you’re in danger or have experienced abuse, the legal system provides tools to help protect you. Steps you can take include:
- Call 911 if you’re in immediate danger
- Request an emergency restraining order through law enforcement
- Visit your local courthouse to file for a restraining order
- Contact a domestic violence shelter or advocate for help
- Document injuries, threats, or past abuse (photos, messages, reports)
You don’t have to go through the process alone. There are resources available to support your safety and legal rights.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can I contact the victim if they contact me first?
No. If a restraining order is in place, only the court can modify or lift it. Contact initiated by the protected person does not give you legal permission to respond.
Will a restraining order show up in a background check?
Yes. Even temporary restraining orders may appear during background checks, especially if they are part of a criminal case.
Can a domestic violence charge be expunged?
It depends on your jurisdiction and the outcome of the case. Some states allow expungement of dismissed charges or non-violent misdemeanors after a waiting period.
Do I need a lawyer if I’ve been charged with domestic violence?
Yes. Because domestic violence charges can lead to jail time, a permanent criminal record, and the loss of civil rights, it’s strongly recommended to hire a qualified defense attorney as early as possible.
Final Thoughts: Understanding the Legal Landscape
Domestic violence charges and restraining orders are life-altering events. Whether you’re seeking protection or defending yourself against accusations, understanding your legal rights and responsibilities is key.
A restraining order is not just a piece of paper—it is a legal boundary enforced by the court. Likewise, domestic violence charges can carry lasting consequences that go far beyond jail time. The best approach is to be informed, proactive, and represented by legal counsel.
